Is this for real? Well it looks like a real article to me. Who in their right mind though would think that anyone would be interested in this? It has to be a joke right?
WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION! 1. Why do you tell the cop that you were masturbating? 2. How does this information make it to a newspaper? 3. Who the hell is the editor of the paper who okayed printing this? Seems like this comes from small town paper so I bet the Cole Ave. man is pretty embarassed cause EVERYONE knows who he is!

What a detailed report! You now know to keep your eyes open for two men who have Have a Nice Day smiley face bags and REALLY itchy crotches!

Are you serious? OMG OMG OMG it's a baby in the trash can OMG OMG OM.......oh wait a second nevermind it's only a burrito! Hmmmmm that's a pretty big burrito, wonder where i can get me one of those?

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